In America, weddings are full of traditions that we’ve borrowed from cultures around the globe, whether that’s because they add something special or because they’re plain cool! However, some of these traditions we’ve copied have very different original intentions and meaning. Here are twelve wedding traditions that Americans borrowed but didn’t quite get right. That doesn’t mean you have to stop doing them, although you might want to be aware of the truth behind them!
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The White Wedding Dress Isn’t About Purity
Many cultures associate white with mourning rather than purity and the trend of wearing white wedding dresses began when Queen Victoria chose a white gown for her wedding in 1840. It was just because she liked the color! But Americans later adopted white dresses, believing they symbolize innocence & purity, yet this technically isn’t true at all.
Bridal Veil to Ward Off Evil Spirits
Ancient Roman & Greek brides used to wear veils to protect themselves from evil spirits that might be jealous of their happiness—the veil was a kind of shield against these unseen forces. But today, most brides wear veils because they’re a nice accessory or a symbol of modesty, rather than their real meaning. We’ve largely forgotten the fact that they’re meant to protect the bride from harm.
Kissing the Bride Sealed a Legal Contract
Ancient Romans also believed that a kiss was a way to seal legal contracts and the wedding kiss was meant to be the couple’s public agreement to their marriage contract. Today though, we see the kiss as simply a romantic gesture—”you may now kiss the bride” is more of an invitation than anything official. Of course, there are still some people who don’t think the wedding is official until the deed is done!
Throwing Rice Misinterpreted as Harmful
Throwing rice at newlyweds is an ancient tradition that’s meant to help the newlyweds be prosperous and many people in America used to follow this tradition. But the myth that rice is harmful to birds meant that lots of us stopped doing this, going for alternatives like bubbles or confetti. That’s not true—rice isn’t harmful to birds at all and we’re ignoring a special tradition by avoiding it!
The Bouquet Toss Was a Diversion Tactic
In medieval Europe, guests believed that touching the bride would bring good luck and this meant they’d try to tear pieces of her dress—to avoid this, brides would toss their bouquets. This would distract the crowd so the happy couple could make a quick getaway and in America today, we use the bouquet toss to predict who might marry next. But its origins actually revolve around it being a clever escape plan instead!
Cake Cutting Was Once a Solo Act
Brides used to cut their wedding cakes alone because doing so was meant to symbolize fertility & mark her transition into womanhood—that’s quite different from modern American weddings. These days, the couple cuts the cake together and turns it into a photo opportunity, with the meaning changing from it being a rite of passage for the bride. It’s more of a shared moment that doesn’t reflect its original meaning.
Honeymoon as a Time to Hide
The idea of having a honeymoon comes from the less romantic practice of bridal abduction, where the groom would hide the bride from her family until they accepted the marriage. The “honeymoon” period was the time when the bride would get pregnant! Thankfully, we don’t see the honeymoon in the same way anymore and, instead, it’s just a chance for a romantic vacation.
Carrying the Bride Over the Threshold to Avoid Evil
The custom of carrying the bride over the threshold began with the belief that evil spirits were hiding at the entrance of a new home. As such, people believed that carrying the bride would protect her from any lurking dangers—we don’t think the same way in modern American weddings. Instead, we see it as more of a romantic gesture without the original superstition in mind.
Stomping on Glass Without Cultural Understanding
One important part of Jewish wedding traditions is breaking a glass, which is meant to symbolize the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem—it’s also meant to remind people of how happiness may be easily broken. Some American couples include this ritual without understanding its religious significance. They turn a meaningful act into a novelty without any context or actual knowledge of why they’re doing it.
Misrepresenting the Italian Confetti Tradition
In Italy, “confetti” is sugar-coated almonds that people give to guests as a symbol of both the bitter & sweet aspects of marriage—it’s not exactly easy, after all. But most Americans think of confetti as tiny pieces of paper tossed in the air during celebrations, as we’ve adopted the term yet use paper instead. In doing so, we’ve lost the original meaning of sharing life’s ups and downs with loved ones and such a sweet gesture has just become a festive decoration.
Misinterpreting the Greek Money Dance
The Greek money dance (known as “Kalamatiano” or “Horos Tou Gamou”) involves guests pinning money onto the bride & groom as they dance—it’s meant to give them some financial support for their new life together. You’ll see the same practice in some American weddings, although it’s more of a competition among guests instead. The money dance doesn’t have the same meaning of communal support & sharing happiness as it once did.
Misunderstanding the Engagement Ring’s Origin
The practice of giving engagement rings dates back to ancient Egypt when circles symbolized eternity and it wasn’t until the 1940s that diamonds became popular. This was solely due to aggressive advertising campaigns, not ancient tradition—the size & cost of the diamond doesn’t have any bearing. Unfortunately, our love for bling overshadows the original symbol of everlasting love.
Disclaimer – This list is solely the author’s opinion based on research and publicly available information.